Best & Worst Hockey Movies
Now that my summer is coming to a close, now’s the time to talk about all of the hockey films out there that has graced my screen this summer. Sure, there are a few good ones out there…and then the absolutely horrible ones.
Here’s the Top 7, best and worst Hockey Movies EVER made.
THE BEST OF THE BEST
7. Me, Myself & Irene. Oh wait…this wasn’t a hockey film…it just starred a few hockey players: Brendan Shanahan, Cam Neely…
6. Mighty Ducks 2. The most exciting things I love about watching the MD films, is seeing what hockey players are actually in the film. Chris Chelios, Wayne Gretzky, Cam Neely, Luc Robitaille all made guest appearances.
5. Mighty Ducks. This film holds a special place in my heart. It was the movie that made me like hockey as a kid (too bad we couldn’t watch hockey on TV in the midwest). Re-watching the film as an adult, I can’t help but say…Wow…Mike Modano was in this film? Remember when this was the Minnesota North Stars? Oh how the years go by. Thanks to this movie, a new hockey team was born: The Mighty Ducks of Anaheim, sold by Disney in the post-lockout era. They are now the Stanley Cup winning Ducks of Anaheim.
4. Mystery, Alaska. Russell Crowe. Russell Crowe. *sigh* Ok…I have a mad crush on Mr. Crowe, but before he was GLADIATOR, he was John Biebe, local town sheriff and captain of the Mystery, Alaska hockey team. My favorite part, of course, is when the two kids are signed to the NHL after the big match versus the New York Rangers. Yes, I cried when they had their dreams realized [must be what it feels like on draft day for so many of these guys].
3. The Rocket. I really loved this film. Sean Avery and Vincent Lecavalier star (even if they are in such small roles). This film is a historical look into the life of Maurice Richard. Leave it to the Canadians to do him justice in this film. I highly recommend this film to anyone and everyone. My favorite part…when Richard kicks Avery’s ass. Richard instantly became my all-time favorite never seen with my own eyes hockey player that ever played the game of hockey. [Take notes, Ilya.] Yes, I cried throughout this movie (and I now have a secret crush on the guy that played Richard).
2. Miracle. Another Disney film about hockey? Disney does it best by commemorating the 1980 Team USA’s win over Team Russia. Not only did it create history on ice, but the event brought about one of the most famous quotes in sports history from Al Michaels: Do you believe in miracles? Yes, I cried at the end of the movie.
1. Slap Shot. Starring Paul Newman and those crazy Hanson brothers. The movie may be old (1977), but it is still one of the greatest hockey films EVER. Not only do you get a glimpse into the crazy life of a hockey player (think minor leagues moreso than NHL), but you also get to experience the crazy antics that made the Hanson brothers famous. Yes, I did cry throughout this film. I was laughing so hard, I was crying.
THE WORST OF THE WORST.
7. Sudden Death. I’m sorry, but no film worth any merit as a hockey film stars Jean-Claude Van Damme. Especially during the good years of his career. He’s a fighter, not a hockey enthusiast. He is better suited for the Kung Fu Panda 2 role than a hockey movie role. This film still gives me nightmares 15 years later.
6. Slap Shot 2. Stephen Baldwin. I need say no more.
5. Youngblood. I don’t care what you guys say…this movie was HORRIBLE. The only reason why guys even like the film is because of that chick. Really? That’s like saying I liked Slap Shot 3 because Mark Messier was in the film.
4. Slap Shot 3. The only reason why I even watched the movie was because Mark Messier was in it. That was the only thing worth watching. Total time: 10 seconds. The rest of the movie wasn’t worth watching. Really, I wanted to hit the lead actor. He sucked at hockey AND skating so much, I wanted to just end us all of our misery. The only thing I liked about the film was the red headed commentator kid.
3. The Tooth Fairy. While I covered this story and gave it a positive review for the message it gives to children, it gets thumbs down in the hockey portion of the story. Maybe Dwayne Johnson shouldn’t have said he didn’t know how to skate until a couple of weeks before filming. HE USED A STUNT DOUBLE. Knowing that alone is 100% of the reason why hockey fans should not watch. But if you have kids, it’s a great lesson in life.
2. Bon Cop, Bad Cop. NHL Commissioner BUTTMAN. While some fans may find the humor in that, the film was just blah and more blah. If they left out the whole hockey part, the film probably would have been decent. But since this serial murderer was a crazy hockey fan that was upset that his hockey team was moved from Canada to the US…gotta say the only thing I got out of the film was how psychotic Canadians can be about their hockey. The serial killer was just the mad extreme in this case. Almost makes you want to give them the Phoneix Coyotes…
1. The Love Guru. I think after the first 10 minutes I exclaimed, “Someone just shoot me to end my misery!” How could a Toronto Maple Leaf fan do this to hockey? Yeah…I’m talking about Mike Myers defacing the game of hockey with this crap film. A love guru helping out a broken-hearted Toronto Maple Leaf player whose wife left him for an LA King? Please… Just call her sloppy seconds and get it over with. [Much love to Romany Malco though…he loves hockey and trained with the LA Kings for this film. I give him props because he always loved talking hockey with me.]